God is Angry With Me

I can draw no conclusions,
when all the roads lead to deserted towns,
when all the songs are sung
when the night is a friend I once knew

except perhaps, that happiness is a face in the crowd.

I am no good at maths

This is a fairly accurate representation of my life over the last decade. Its funny how you can pretty much reduce your entire existence into blocks of well-defined emotion. Ultimately, though I think that what I'm feeling is complex and layered, it really just boils down to whether I'm happy, sad, angry or calm. Yep, that's pretty much all there is to me.

Holes in my bookshelf,
Holes in my music rack
Holes in the wall
burning nice big holes in my heart.

Armageddon

Apple makes you pay for things that are otherwise free. So does Blackberry. And yet, I have an iPod, a Macbook and a Blackberry.

       Me: A case in point for why human civilisation is too stupid to continue for much longer.

The Basic Structure of the Constitution

Its a book, with a front and back cover. Has about 22 parts. Not very bulky.
(haHA)

Storms

Everyday in a million things;
In the faces of people I don't know,  in pictures of places I've never been, 
In two penny tunes played out on distant street corners, in the voices I've never spoken to.

Your shadows chase me;
Down dusty roads painted by dusky sunsets, in a faraway town falling off the tip of memory
An evil wind blows ever so gently, rustling the leaves off trees that should no longer exist

Every night in a million things;
In streetlamps that shatter their light on cobblestones, in dark clouds of rain that I thought were spent,
In stormy nights that blow me back to cold old places, in the pain that haunts me now, every single day.

I see you.

But no longer when you're standing right in front of me.

And when I walk onward and try not to look back,
always there are storms in my mind,
and clouds at my heels.

Blackberry singing in the dead of night,
Take these broken dreams and learn to deal with it.

All your life, you will only be working and underpaid.

Turn to Stone

I want to be brittle and empty.
Like a cup of glass, like a park in the snow.

I want to be dead and cold.
Like ice on a rock, like gravel on a wintery day.

I want to punch through all the walls in this house.
Like a wrecking ball with precision.

Won't you turn me to stone?
Please leave me alone.

There is no way out

And you bring out insomnia, where there was only the desire to sleep and forget
Here I sit bleary eyed, robbed of my only escape
Mind is twisting and turning like paper in the wind
Any way out will do,
But there is no window
And I don't know whether its up or down that I want to go.

Hi/Bye

The waves came back last night. They'd been gone a really, really long time. I fell uneasily into a pillow of clouds and there they were. Big and green-grey and angry. Coming right for me. Everywhere I looked the towering sea, seemingly standing still like some huge glass statue, but moving so inevitably towards me.

Its so scary facing a wave, knowing that there's nothing you can do about it. Knowing that no matter how fast you run, you can't escape. Not knowing whether you want the moment to freeze forever so that you can delay what you know is going to happen a little longer, or whether you want time to speed up so that you're swallowed up all at once and meet a blissful oblivion, where its all over and you don't have to run anymore, or think anymore, or do anything anymore.

The waves were gone for a while, right about the time I met you actually, now that I think about it. You made them go away. But then I made you go away didn't I.

Christmas Present

Dear God,

If you let me go home for Christmas, I will not be jealous of ALL my friends. Not the girl who is going to Phuket, or the boy who is going to Egypt, or all the people who've put up pictures of themselves in Belize and Majorca.

I promise I'll be genuinely happy for them. Just let me go home.

Love

Me

P.s. - I even promise to be a better person next year. Or at least try to. Wait, are you going to be pissed with me for making promises that I can't keep?

Where's that ribcage now?

Heartfelt

I wear my heart inside my ribcage. Where it belongs.

Safe from everyone.

Love Me Doo Bee Doo.

I love you hopelessly, I love you optimistically.
I love you all crying and bleak.
I love you happy and dizzy.
I love you in the dark, in the sunshine.
I love you beautiful/Dangerous.


I hate everything that happened before. And I think you love it.

Kindlehappy

I want to burn away.

Lie myself down and just burn away.

Feel my ends curl up.

Feel the heat spread over everything.

Lie on the edge of an impossible dream

And burn away.

Let the fire burn away my heart and my mind, full of you.

Question

Q: Are we human or are we dancer?

A: We're human you fool.


Hahahahahahaha. That apart, I actually quite like this song. And I myself have asked way stupider questions in life.

Choices, choices.

New templates, you will be the death of me!!!! ARGH.

There must be a better way to spend my time.

Techno-Bzzp

You know the (my) biggest problem with having a cell phone?

I'm always trying to 'call' all the things that I've misplaced.

Sucks that they haven't figured out how to do it yet. That won't do Science, that won't do.

True Lies

Does Global Warming exist?

Is the pope catholic?
Does Jake Gyllenhaal look hot in Prince of Persia?
Did The Practice lie to all of us about the existence of good looking male lawyers?
Am I scared of tsunamis?
Are lizards systematically precision-falling on me lately?
Does it still hurt a little, if I really, really think back about it?

Its almost 50 degress in Delhi. What. The. Fuck.

Yes, it exists assholes. You come live here and see.

United Postal Service of Me

I sit down at my desk and write you a love letter.
Its a great love letter, full of you know, feelings.
I think you will like it.
I write to tell you about my days and nights and the things I do and the things I see.
I write and write and write and write. There's so much to say.

But then I realise, there's no point writing to you. You never reply. To me.